Team Edward

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Jacob Membership Card

No offense, but I recieved a Jacob Membership card. Soz.

Renesmee

(In the hospital...)

Kit Kat: Omg! It's a girl Edward! Just like you expected!
Edward: She has your hair, she's just as pretty as you. Even prettier than weirdo Bella.
Kit Kat: Why did you even break up with Bella? In the book, you were meant for each other.
Edward: The book is a liar. Stephanie Meyers told the story the way she wanted. I just came into the room to be interviewed about what HOT vampires do.
Kit Kat: Oh..
Edward: Yeah...
Bella: (Clothes ripped) First she stole my boyfriend, 2nd got me stuck with stinkin' Jacob, and 3rd I JUST HATE HER!
Edward: Ohh... I see a tree outside wearing clothes. :)
Kit Kat: Where is the tree with clothes? I bet Renesmee would like to play with it. :)
Edward: Wait, that isn't a tree, that's a hobo.
Bella: I'M NOT A HOBO!!
Kit Kat: Omg Edward! The hobo tree talks! Get me away from that hobo tree freak!
Bella: I'm no HOBO TREE FREAK! Now give me back my Eddie!
Edward: I HATE that nickname! Omg! Kit Kat, I get it now, the hobo tree is Bella!
Kit Kat&Edward: Wait, she is a hobo tree. Lol.
Edward: Let me, see "Hobo Tree" Bella for a sec.
Kit Kat: Ok, Edward. :)

Bella: Oh, Edward, I knew you'd come back for me! (tears of happiness)
Edward: Actually, I came here to ask you a favor. And even in your dreams, we'd never be together.
Bella: Uhh.. ok.
Edward: Thanks, here's the favor. Can you plz take care of my baby?
Bella: Oh, yes Edward! Anything for you!
Edward: Thanks.
Bella: Don't I get anything in return?
Edward: Yes. I'll be your boyfriend if you promise to take care of my baby.
Bella: Ok (Ekkkk, Omg, Edward is my guy again!!!)

(5 weeks of diaper changing, playing, and caring for Renesmee.)

Edward: How's my girl?
Bella: She's fine, now will you be my guy?
Edward: Actually, I lied, so you could take care of Renesmee while me and Kit Kat were on our 5th honey moon.
Bella: You lied to me? You, my boyfriend, lied to me? How could you?
Edward: I was NEVER your boyfriend Bella! I only worked there to be payed! And make me famous of course, and plus, when you thought we were kissing, I stuck a slug towards your lips. Anyways, your breath always smells like musty doritos. BONUS, you NEVER BRUSH YOUR TEETH, DODO!
Bella: No wonder, my lips were always slimy.
Edward: Yeah... I should be going now.
Bella: Oh, well, I don't need you! I got Jacob!
Edward: Uhh... I hired Jacob to kill you if i gave him 5 steak bones.
Bella: Oh, no AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

(Rip, Tear, Bite, Chomp, Lick, YUM, BURP.)

THE END

CC

Hey guys! I just changed the Edward blog template. Don't u luv it Kit Kat?!

ture

The more rob the better!! ture

                         kit kat

Edward and Kit Kat

Edward: Kit Kat, I can't wait until our children come.
Kit Kat: Awww.. Edward, that's so dearly sweet of you. (Kit Kat rubs her hand on her belly)
Edward: I can tell it's a girl.
Kit Kat: What shall we name her?
Edward: What about Renesmee?
Kit Kat: That's a beautiful name Edward.
(KISS)
(Bella looks into the window of the Cullens home with fury)
Bella: I'll get Edward for doing this to me!
Jacob: Hey Bella, I found you.
Bella: Nooooo!!
(Jacob carries Bella away)
THE END.

Team Edward Rocks! Team Jacob Sucks!

Haha, look at this jingle I made for Team Edward Girls! ;)

Edward Rocks!
Jacob Sucks!
Edward Doesn't Need Alarm Clocks!
Jacob Is So Chicken, That He Clucks!
Edward Sparkles!
Jacob's Hairy!
Edward Can Kiss!
Jacob Thinks He's The One To Be Married!
Edward Protects Bella!
Jacob Wishes He Could Eat Bella!
TEAM EDWARD ROCKS!
team jacob SUCKS!